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Short & Funny Jokes

Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.

The Best Short & Funny Jokes
Just changed my Facebook name to 'No one' so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say 'No one likes this'.
What's the difference between snowmen and snowladies? Snowballs
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
Why did the blonde get excited after finishing her puzzle in 6 months? -- The box said 2-4 years!
What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller.
I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? -- A gummy bear!
I once farted in an elevator, it was wrong on so many levels.
I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.
If con is the opposite of pro, it must mean Congress is the opposite of progress?
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea; does that mean that one enjoys it?
What do you call two fat people having a chat? -- A heavy discussion
My mom never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
For anyone who think a woman's place is in the kitchen, remember that's where the knives are kept.
I used to like my neighbors, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi.
Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together but only one of them knows about it.
Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? -- She didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills!
What's the difference between a smart man and a stupid man? Nothing. They both think they know everything.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.
I'm not saying she's fat. But if I had to name 5 of the fattest people I know. She'd be three of them.

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