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Short & Funny Jokes - Part 5

Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.


Top Funny Short Jokes

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says: "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job.
If brain cells had value, you'd be broke.
I had a dream I was eating a giant marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was missing!
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time! I think I've forgotten this before?
My wife is so negative. I remembered the car seat, the stroller, even the diaper bag. But all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
Fat people are harder to kidnap.
I bet the butcher $50 that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."
Irish saying - There are only three kinds of men who don't understand women: young men, old men, and middle aged men.
The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.
Is Your Dad A Preacher? Cause Girl You’re A Blessing
Want to look thinner? Hang out with fat people.
I pretend to work here, they pretend to pay me.
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
Your IQ is roughly around room temperature.
Have you ever smelled mothballs? How did you get his little legs apart?
Who says nothing is impossible. I've been doing nothing for years.
How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it!
How did the blonde die drinking milk? The cow fell on her.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says: Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job.



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