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Short & Funny Jokes

Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.


Top Funny Short Jokes

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.
What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet? Supplies!
Nothing ruins a Friday more than realizing that today is Tuesday.
Where do horses go shopping? Old-neighvy
Is your name Ariel? Cause we Mermaid for each other!
Do you know why you are supposed to bury a politician 100 feet down? Because deep down they are really good people.
What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how everything works.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
If you don't work you don't have money to live, if you work, there's no time to live.
What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? -- The taste!
What did the big bucket say to the little bucket? -- You look a little pail!
For Christmas, I want Santa's list of naughty girls.
A healthy nap not only makes you feel better, it also shortens the workday.
Roses are red, violets are blue, there is no better place than to be here with you.
Only in American will you see "poor" fat people.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
If we knew what we were doing it wouldn't be called research.
I'd like to have more self-esteem, but I don't deserve it.
Irish diplomacy - the art of telling someone to go to hell in such a way they'll look forward to the trip.
The waves won't be the only thing you'll be riding today.

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The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet? Supplies!Nothing ruins a Friday more than realizing that today is Tuesday.



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