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Short & Funny Jokes

Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.


Top Funny Short Jokes

How did the blonde try to kill the bird? She threw it off the cliff!
Why do hummingbirds hum? Because they don't know the words.
Which side of a chicken has the most feathers? The outside.
Roses are red, violets are blue, lava is hot and so are you.
Q. What's a man's idea of a balanced diet? A. Beer in each hand!
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? -- Because he felt crummy!
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'
Nothing makes me more productive than the last minute.
The only thing wrong with doing nothing is that you never know when you're finished.
Why did the duck get arrested? Because he was selling quack!
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
Roses are red,violets are blue. We're breaking up beacause I never loved you.
Hell is wallpapered with all your deleted selfies.
I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week.
How long have I been working for the company? Ever since they threatened to fire me.
Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
Tell your boss what you think of him, and the truth shall set you free.
Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend?
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.

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How did the blonde try to kill the bird? She threw it off the cliff!Why do hummingbirds hum? Because they don't know the words.  Which side of a chicken has the most feathers? The outside.



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