You look much more attractive in person than you do through my telescope.
You're so beautiful, when I look at you my heart starts beating… I think.
This cold ain't as infectious as your smile.
Are you a loan? Because you're gaining my interest... Capitalism is ruining my life.
If I bit my lip, would you kiss it better? [when she does, rip her face off with teeth]
Wanna give me the d? That means death, please euthanize me.
You're the girl of my nightmares.
Netflix and kill me? Release me from the prison of existence.
Hey baby, Is your name clinical depression? Because you make me want to stay in bed all day trapped beneath your weight.
Call the cops... See who comes first.
Would you be so kind as to lend me your heart, or shall I cut it out myself?
You bleach your hair? Im the same way! I bleach the bloodstains out of my carpet!
This food's going to taste great! Don't worry, you will too.
Like a broken pencil, life without happiness is pointless.
I'm going to make like Toy Story and get Buzzed so I can play with your Woody.
Can I curl up in your arms and let the beat of your heart soothe me to sleep? Because that sounds absolutely lovely.
You're hotter than my fever.
I thought for a second I died and went to heaven when I saw your sad face, but then you smiled and I am alive and heaven has been brought to me.
You make me want to spend the rest of my meaningless life silently despairing over the thought that you'll find a better man than I and take the kids when you leave.
If I had a nickel for every day I've been wanting to be with a girl like you, I still wouldn't be able to pay off my father's crippling gambling debts that tore apart my family.
I've got quick hands, a fast horse, and strong arms that can hold you tight all night long.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together at an MGMT show.
Oh you're a Libra? That's so weird! So were my other three vic... Dates!
I'm looking for treasure, mind if I explore your chest?
Hey baby, wanna boldly go where no man has been before?
Are you a noose? Cause I'd love to hang out with you some time!
Hey baby, let's lay and learn what each other's bodies are for.
I like my men like I like my coffee....I don't like coffee.
Hey wanna play softball, we can take turns pitching and catching.
Roses are red, your underwear is lace, take them off and sit on my face.
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