Vegans and vegetarians field a lot of tedious jokes, so an opener that is actually funny stands out immediately. This is our collection of vegan and vegetarian pick up lines, ranked by reader votes, covering plants, tofu, dairy-free everything and the ethics of the whole thing. They work at vegan cafes, farmers' markets, festivals and on apps where someone has put it in their profile. The good ones are affectionate rather than mocking — readers have consistently pushed the sneering ones down the list, which tells you which approach actually gets a response.
