Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.

The Best Insults

Hey girl, Can you show me how to fish?
Unlike Han, I won't shoot first.
You can quit swimming after your dreams, I'm right here.
If men were landing pages, I'd only want to convert on you.
If you were a youtube video, I would watch you intensely at night without anybody knowing.
I think we have a connection stronger than our wifi.
Emojis can't describe the way I feel about you.
Do you know how long it takes for your mother to take a crap? Nine months.
I'll never forget the first time we met, although I'll keep trying.
Don't feel sad, don't feel blue, Frankenstein was ugly too.
If you spoke your mind, you'd be speechless.
I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.
You're so ugly you make blind kids cry.
You're the best at all you do - and all you do is make people hate you.
When was the last time you could see your whole body in the mirror?
You are proof that God has a sense of humor.
So you've changed your mind, does this one work any better?
Your eyes are as blue as the sea I dumped my ex’s body in.
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
You look like something I'd draw with my left hand.

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