Funny Puns

Puns are great and quick way to make someone laugh or give you a nasty look! Give it a go and see if your friend has a sense of humor. It's always funnier if they're slow to get the pun.

The Best Puns

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
Why did the little fella sleep on the chandelier? Because he was a light sleeper.
What do you call a train loaded with toffee? A chew chew train.
The Irish government is wealthy because its capital is always Dublin.
To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing!
I've been to the dentist several times so I know the drill.
A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"
What would you get if you crossed a donkey with an owl? A smart ass which knows it all.
A guy walks into the psychiatrist's office wearing only Glad Wrap shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
I've found a job helping a one armed typist do capital letters. It's shift work
What do the movies titanic and the sixth sense have in common? -- Icy dead people
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.
A monster who likes to ring doorbells is a knock less monster.
Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
Practice safe eating, always use condiments.
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Without geometry, life is pointless.

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