Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
You're so good lookin' I'd drink your bath water.
Do you have a snorkel? Because you take my breath away.
Can I be your beach fire? Because I want to keep you warm all night.
Are you a non-compete clause? Because I'd never want anyone else but you.
I'm kind of new around here... can you show me the way to your apartment/house?
You must be my opening statement, because you've set the tone for something amazing.
Hi, I'm a fashion photographer. Would you like to be in my next photo shoot?
Is your Dad in prison? If I were your Dad, I'd be in prison.
Are you a lighthouse? Because you guide me towards happiness.
Are you a power drill? Because you've driven straight into my heart.
You're like my toolbox—full of everything I need.
Can I be your surf instructor? Because I want to ride the waves of your love.
You must be a law review article, because you're so well-composed and brilliant.
Are you a tide? Because you make my heart rise and fall.
Are you a jury verdict? Because you're unanimous perfection.
You must be strict liability, because I'm falling for you, no matter what.
Are you a circuit breaker? Because you've stopped me in my tracks.
Are you a potato? Because you're the root of all my happiness.
I bet it hurt when you fell from Heaven? I can help you get there if you'd like?
You're like a perfectly installed cable—smooth, flawless, and essential.
