Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
You must be a cash flow statement, because you make my heart run smoothly.
Are you my balance sheet? Because you're everything I've been looking for.
Are you retained earnings? Because I want to invest in you forever.
Are you FIFO? Because you've been first in my heart for a long time.
You must be an audit, because you've uncovered all the best parts of me.
Are you a T-account? Because you balance me perfectly.
Do you believe in accrual love? Because my feelings for you just keep building.
You're like my favorite ledger—every time I think of you, things just add up.
Are you a journal entry? Because you've got me adjusting my priorities.
You must be a debit, because you've got my attention balanced.
Are you an asset? Because you've increased the value of my life.
Cheers to a night of new beginnings... and to you being in all of mine.
I didn't need fireworks to feel the sparks—meeting you was enough.
Are you as excited for midnight as I am? Because I've got a kiss saved just for you.
If tonight's about starting fresh, I'd love to start something with you.
I didn't expect to find a reason to celebrate beyond midnight—but here you are.
If you're the start of my year, I know it's going to be incredible.
Are you a quiet lake? Because your presence brings me peace like nothing else.
Are you a fishing license? Because you're the only permission I need to be happy.
Are you a crankbait? Because you've cranked up my heartbeat.
