Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
Are you an objection? Because you just overruled my better judgment.
You must be precedent, because everything about you sets the standard.
I'm no attorney, but I'd argue we're a perfect match.
Are you cross-examining me? Because I feel like I'm under your spell.
You must be a contract, because I want to sign my heart over to you.
Are you a deposition? Because I want to hear everything about you.
My love for you is like stare decisis—it's binding and unshakable.
Are you my law professor? Because I could study you all day.
You must be a judge, because you've ruled over my heart.
Are you a statute? Because you've codified everything I've ever wanted.
You must be tort law, because you've caused some serious emotional damage—in the best way.
I'd waive all my rights just to spend more time with you.
Are you an affidavit? Because you've sworn to steal my heart.
You must be habeas corpus, because you've captured my soul and brought it to court.
Is your name Justice? Because you're what I've been searching for.
Are you voir dire? Because you're selecting all the right qualities in me.
You're the reason my crops are thriving—pure love in abundance.
You must be a silo, because you keep all my love safe and sound.
Are you a wheelbarrow? Because I want to carry my feelings for you everywhere.
Are you fresh milk? Because you're the cream of the crop.
