Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
Are you a bandage? Because you're healing all my wounds.
You must specialize in wound care, because you're closing up all my scars.
Are you PPE? Because I feel safe and secure with you around.
You're like a well-stocked med cart—always ready to provide comfort.
Are you a blood pressure cuff? Because you've got me feeling the squeeze.
You must be on night shift, because you've got me dreaming of you.
Are you a thermometer? Because you're heating up my heart.
You're like my favorite scrub top—soft, comfortable, and perfect.
Are you my nursing shift partner? Because we'd make the perfect team.
You must be an IV bag, because you've got me feeling hydrated and alive.
Are you a patient chart? Because I'd study you all night.
You're like a shot of adrenaline—an instant rush to my heart.
Are you a pulse ox monitor? Because you've got me at 100%.
You must be a triage nurse, because you've prioritized my heart.
Are you a call light? Because I can't stop reaching for you.
You're the best part of my 12-hour shift.
Are you a medication? Because you've got me feeling better already.
Are you galvanized steel? Because you're strong, dependable, and unbreakable.
You must be a pipe wrench, because you've tightened all my loose ends.
Are you a pipe wrench? Because you've got a firm grip on my heart.
