Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
Why watch fireworks outside when the real magic is happening right here with you?
Are you goodwill? Because you're making me feel priceless.
Are you a motion to dismiss? Because I can't object to anything about you.
I must need CPR, because you've taken my breath away.
Are you a doctor's note? Because you're my reason to take a break from everything else.
You must be a white coat, because you're the symbol of everything I admire.
Are you a pipe? Because I'm completely connected to you.
You're like a new set of tools—exciting, shiny, and so useful in my life.
You're like the perfect flow rate—steady, reliable, and just right.
Is that a shark in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Do you mind if I push in your stool?
Do you like the telletubbies? Because you look like Tinkie Winkie.
Did you eat paint chips when you were a kid?
When anorexics see you, they think they need to go on a diet.
Hey baby, why don't you and me go somewhere nice and pass the Bechdel Test together?
Come ride my star rocket and feel it explode, with the the thrust of two engines transporting my load.
Are you British? Cause I wanna screw EU.
You want to dip your chips into my salsa?
If you were a burger at McDonald's, you would be the new McShock.
