Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.
The Best Insults
Hey girl call me Rockwell 'cause I'd like to show you my slab-serif.
If I was an artist, you would be my picture!
He can turn my spotlight on.
You make me Les Miserable.
Hey, are you that high note I couldn't hit at callbacks? Cause I can't stop thinking about you.
I'm getting into character by getting into your pants.
Hey girl. You know what my dream role is? A stallion. Cuz then you could ride me eight times a week.
My dream role is to be your girlfriend.
If I blow into the mic will you give me feedback?
Are you the LD today? Because you're all I can focus on.
You give me more butterflies than a places call.
Are you theatre curtains? Cause I like it when you open up.
Are you that line i just brutally messed up? because i can't stop thinking about you.
Gabriel won't be the only thing blowing tonight.
Being apart from you is like feedback in the microphones...it's so painful and ill do anything i can to avoid it.
I want to spend all 525,600 minutes with you.
You can do my eyeliner anytime.
You don't have to get out of my way when I have a crossover.
Hey girl, wanna help me recalibrate my sound board?
Are you a techie carrying a large set piece? 'Cause you just knocked me off my feet.
Are you that scene I messed up? Because I can't stop thinking about you.
I like musicals and I'm straight and I'm willing to sing with you.
Hey girl, are you my light? 'Cause I can't believe it took me this long to find you.
Do you like musicals? 'Cause I'm a boy who's into Broadway.
If you were a script, i'd never want to be off book.
Are you a spotlight cause you're blinding me and making it hard to wall.
Not being with you is like when your bobby pin is pulling on only one hair. It hurts so bad.
I will make you the best single mother ever!
Girl you like Kool-Aid in a wine glass with dat fine ass!
Girl, I wanna pop some caps with you till da hood do us part.
You da only one I'd ever spend my minutes on.
Hey do you have an inhaler? Cause you got dat ass ma!
Let me flip this coin and whatever side it land on that's what I get.
I'm wasted, but this condom in my pocket doesn't have to be.
I usually don't ask a girl this question till she's pregnant. What's your name?
I'm gonna call heaven and tell 'em that an angel is missing, but I'm kinda hoping that you're a slut.
Just get in the car, bitch. I'm famous.
My pants might be in the wrong place but my heart is always in the right place.
Ohh I was wondering... Can I have yo' numba?
So tell me, does ur pants thank u for spending time with them when u take them off?
That ass so fat, you could pull a brothas eyes out with the gravity!
Watch your step girl, I do not want you to fall in love with someone else.
Yo gurl, I heard you're good at math, Cause your legs are always divided.
Your lips taste like grape kool-aid.
I have good credit
Hey, are your parents beavers? because DAAAAYYMMMM!
Hey boo, I'd like to be a part of your next abortion.
Girl, I'm gonna have to put you on my To Do List!
If fine was a felony you'd be on death row!
Aye girl lemme beat it like some cake mix!
Baby, you thicker than the bible, and I wanna read all yo pages!
Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw!
Girl, ya look like a bottle of maple syrup... THICK!
Hey girl you got a father? Want a daddy?
Hey baby, are you looking for affordable housing? Cuz I've got an opening on Boner Street!
If what matters is on the inside, how do I get on the inside?
Who's ya hair dresser? Tell her I apologize for messing up her work!
I'm digging you like a shovel ma!
Honey, being with me is like a roller coaster. There's always the possibility you could throw up.
Forget that roller coaster baby come get on this log ride!
You must be a ferris wheel because I wanna take a ride on you.
I have the best roller coaster in town, wanna go for a ride?
Ride with me now and I'll ride you later.
I'm a theme park, ride me all you can before the sun sets.
Would you like to be in the sword-swollowing act?
It doesn't take a ticket to let you ride me.
You wanna ride the big slide?
How about trying the thrill ride in my pants?
I've got an amusement park in my pants.
I wanna make you Splash Mountain all over my Power Tower.
Are you here for Steel Vengeance? Because I'd like to take you on the wildest ride of your life.
Is your name the Beast, because I want to ride you tonight.
Is your name Dolly? Because I have some great wood waiting for you.
Want to go for Mind Eraser? I'd sure like to Hang and Bang with you!
El Toro is great, but wait until you see my big woody!
Hey girl, Big Thunder Mountain might be right over there, but I can assure you that I'm the wildest ride in the wilderness.
Girl are you space mountain? Because you're better with the lights off.
Is that a woodie or are you just happy to see me?
Are you a Dragon Wagon? Because I'm too big to fit.
Are you RMC? Because you turn my woodie to steel
I'm not going to be the only credit whore tonight!
My Beast is the longest woody in the world!
Hey girl, are you a chain lift? Because I want to clickety-clack with you tonight!
With you I am the real me, and nothing else seems to matter.
Thinking about the vocation of marriage? You should come and see me for a discernment weekend.
If I had a rosary bead for everytime I thought of you, I would have a Glorious Mystery.
You ever read Genesis? Because God saw that it is not good for man to be alone.
Excuse me, I believe one of your ribs belongs to me. (Said to a fella.)
Hey boy, are you confirmation? because you complete me.
I think I'm called to the married life, could I call you sometime?
You know they say that you have never really dated until you've dated a.
How important is having a big family too you?
Here's a red rose. I think St. Therese of Lisieux wanted you to have it.
Are you the sacrament of Confirmation? Because you complete me.
Do you believe in Divine appointment?
Will you join me on this adventure called life, and journey with me to heaven?
You want to come over and watch the 10 commandments tonight?
You know they say that you have never really dated, until you have dated a.
Here I am, the answer to your prayers.
Hey girl, I don't need a website to know that you're my perfect Match.
