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Funny Christmas Jokes, Riddles and Puns

Happy Holidays and laughter with our hilarious collection of Christmas jokes. We've got the classic Santa, Elves, Reindeer jokes and a lot more.


The Best Funny Christmas Jokes

What do sheep say to each other at Christmas? Merry Christmas to ewe
What happened to the thief who stole a Christmas calendar? He got 12 months
Who says oh, oh, oh? Santa Claus walking backwards
Who delievers Christmas presents to cats? Santa Claws
What Christmas carol do they sing in the dessert? Camel ye fathful
What color Christmas candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle? Neither – Candles always burn shorter.
What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Can you smell carrot?
Where do snowmen go to dance? A snow ball
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas? A mince spy!
How does a snowman lose weight? He waits for the weather to get warmer!
How many presents can Santa fit in an empty sack? Only one, after that it’s not empty any more!
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas? Deep and crisp and even!
What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents? Silent Night!
What’s impossible to overtake at Christmas? The three wide men!
A definition of Christmas: The time when everyone gets "Santa"-mental.
What do you call an elf who steals gift wrap from the rich and gives it to the poor? Ribbon Hood!
What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has "no EL"!
Do you ever buy any Christmas Seals? No, I wouldn't know how to feed them.
How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico? Fleece Navidad!
What never eats at Christmas dinner? The turkey – it’s stuffed

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