Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Top Funny Short Jokes
When I see you my main sail rise.
You would be perfect for this movie I'm shooting its called Dirty Sanchez
Why do i need a girlfriend when i can have a boyfriend, keito-kun?
There's nothing I won't do for you, and I'm going to keep on doing it.
Those aren't sugar plums dancing through my head, it's all you.
Are you a medical license? Because you're proof that perfection exists.
Are you a hospital bed? Because I'd rest easy with you by my side.
Girl. Let me be your imam.
You must love Halloween! You don't need a costume to look like an angel.
Hey there, you like Glazed or creme filled?
I'm masc, hung, clean, and generous.
My two favorite letters of the alpabet E Z.
I like your wart, want to see a few of mine?
Is your name Sunshine? Because you are “In my soul todayâ€.
You have the cutest smile when you sleep.
If you ever want to see your children again, you'll do what I want.
Don't mind me observing you, I'm just doing some case study.
What do you call Santa Claus when he doesn't move? Santa Pause
That outfit would look great crumpled in a heap on unsolved mysteries.
What do zombies put on their Christmas turkey? Grave-y
What do reindeer have that no other animals have? Baby reindeer!
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?
Why does Santa do in his garden? He hoe hoe hoes
What goes ho-ho whoosh, ho-ho whoosh? Santa caught in a revolving door
Are you a thief? Because you've stolen my heart. Now get in the trunk.
Baby, you must be a broom because I'm going to snap your head off and clean the floor with it.
You don't need car keys to drive me crazy. But I need them to run you over.
What is Santa's favorite Olympic event? North Pole-vault
What song did the guests sing at the Eskimo's Christmas party? Freeze a jolly fellow
What did the cow say to the reindeer? Moo
What is the wettest animal at the North Pole? The rain-deer
What song do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells.
This sunburn is hot, but baby... you're hotter.
Do you go to church? Because you're the answer to my prayers!
Get rid of your smoke detector and sleep with a firefighter.
You must be accounts receivable, because I've been waiting for you my whole life.
When you fell from heaven, did it leave you with any lasting emotional scars?
Is that a stalagmite feature or are you just happy to see me?
Are you that line I screwed up? Because I can't stop thinking about you.
Unlike everyone else in Les Miserables, my love for you will never die.
I usually use protection, but I'll make an exception.
Girl I've got some allostatic load for you right here.
Hey girl, wanna belay me?
Girl you put me in an altered state of consciousness.
If I told you I was falling hard, would you be my belayer?
That shirt looks great on you, but it would look even better in an evidence bag.
Are you a trap seal? Because you've locked in all my feelings.
