Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Top Funny Short Jokes
Are you from South England? Cause you Brighton up my day.
You're hotter than the London Underground during rush hour.
How'd you like to be in my will?
My email password has been hacked. That's the third time I've had to rename the cat.
If you were a soccer ball, I'd never shoot. Because I would always miss you.
You are the greatest sparkling wine in this world that I want to taste for the rest of my life.
Hey baby, let's lay and learn what each other's bodies are for.
You're such a pathetic excuse for a human being that even bacteria would turn their noses up at the thought of infecting you.
Well, here I am. So what are your other two wishes?
You be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, we can have it your way, I'll treat you right!
You're just my cup of tea!
Oh my god, do we have the same bra on? Let's look and see!
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
You're like a cut on my wrist... people like you hurt me, but I keep getting more.
Make crime pay, become a lawyer.
Irish Blessing - As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.
Laziness is when a person doesn't fake that he's working.
You look much more attractive in person than you do through my telescope.
Are you my appendix? I have a gut feeling I should take you out.
What do dim lamps and blondes have in common? They both tend to be hot, but not too bright.
