Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
I've got some new rubbers, so it's ok to sow my wild oats if it gets too wet in the field.
I've fallen for you so hard, I can't think straight.
Ladies if you saw how good I take care of my yards, just imagine how I'd take care of your heart.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a knife. Get in the car.
I was looking for treasure and I think I found some.
Do you believe in love at first sip or should I take another?
Girl you must be blue, because you're the hottest star around right now.
Oh, you're straight? So is spaghetti until it gets hot and wet.
Are you David Beckham? Because I'd bend for you.
How does a penguin build it's house? Igloos it together.
What was the librarians favorite Christmas song? Silent Night
Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
Hey baby, Is your name clinical depression? Because you make me want to stay in bed all day trapped beneath your weight.
I wanna rope you, but I don't want to give you rope burn.
What do you call two gay Irish men? -- Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick.
I know you pregnant but when you drop that one off, I'd love to put another one in u.
How do you know your girlfriend is getting fat? -- She fits into your wife's clothes
I'm not anti-social... I'm just not user friendly.
My resume is just a list of things I hope I never get asked to do.
Are you in the Air Force? Cause your hotter than the engine of an F-22A Raptor.
