Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Top Funny Short Jokes
Would you like your parrot on this shoulder....or THIS shoulder?
Are you Macbeth? Because your name sends shivers down my spine.
I may not be Heath, but I can sure balance your ledger.
If I was a ref would you blow my whistle?
You won't believe it but I'm shocking in bed.
Your face is like a train wreck, impossible to look away from despite the horror it invokes.
Your appearance is an affront to the very concept of beauty, a walking abomination.
Congratulations, you've managed to achieve a level of ugliness that defies all known standards of aesthetics.
Even the most skilled plastic surgeon in the world would throw up their hands in defeat at the sight of your face.
Wanna come over to myspace so I could twitter your yahoo till you google all over my facebook.
I can't be fired. Slaves are sold!
You can pee on my fire hydrant all night long.
I hope you don't object to this leading question but, you want me don't you?
You can quit swimming after your dreams, I'm right here.
You might want to call a bomb squad, because there's going to be an explosion in your anus.
I'm an interior decorator. I can fill your interior
I may not be Elisha but will you open the door anyway.
Country boys don't need pick-up lines, because they've got pick-up trucks.
Ice cold coffee? Cool beans!
I do not like work even when someone else does it.
