Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
I'm new in town, where's the best place to taste some really good local wine?
Your body is in screaming affluence!
Hey, I don't mean to grab but, I'm a real ladykiller.
Do you like jalapeños? Cause in a minute I'll be jalapeño pants tonigh.
You must be an artist, because I find myself drawn to you.
If you were a car, I'd jack you up and check out your undercarriage.
I ordered a beer because talking to you made me nervous as hell. Please, terrify me again at your earliest convenience.
Are you Ivanovic? Because I'd sure take a bite out of you.
You can't kiss an Irish girl unexpectedly. You can only kiss her sooner than she thought you would.
Of all the Stars in all the Galaxy, you had to hitch your planet to mine.
Hey babe, can I colonize your land and exploit you for your natural resources.
Your car's headlights are dimmer than your future prospects, casting a feeble glow on the road ahead.
You can pee on my fire hydrant all night long.
Who was the slowest of the ancient Greek philosophers? Aristurtle.
Are you Barça or Dortmund? Because even if you lose, you're still a winner in my eyes.
I brought an extra air mattress, would like to lay out in the pool with me?
I smelled you down the street, and my nose brought me right to you.
I prefer the European version of sunbathing.
