Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
What's the most common sleeping position of a man? Around.
Your appearance is so repulsive, it could curdle milk from a hundred yards away.
Moaning about other people not working really makes the day fly by.
I've seen roadkill that's more visually appealing than your sorry excuse for a face.
If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.
I know you're a knockout, so how'd you get me in this submission?
If there was a contest for the ugliest person in the world, you'd win by a landslide.
I wish I could harvest you at peak season.
Here's my number. Just in case you ever need a grappling partner without a shirt... or pants.
You're getting a long one tonight, and I'm not talking about the Home Run Derby!
Do you believe in love at first sight or shouldn't I have ripped your eyes out?
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement!
I've been trying to push the envelope at work, but it's still stationery.
May I stick a banana in your tailpipe?
Want to get some air? Oh wait, I ate your lungs.
Are you a boxer? Well you should be, you're one hell of a knock out!
If you were ice cream and I were hot chocolate I'd pour all my love onto you.
He works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
Are you from Tennessee? Because that's the only state I'm not wanted in.
It's a good thing same-sex marriage is legal here, because I'm already planning our wedding.
