Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Top Funny Short Jokes
You can spur me all night long.
You're like my toolbox—always full of everything I need.
Your ugliness is so intense, it's like a punch in the face to anyone unfortunate enough to gaze upon you.
Are you a Nike One Platinum ball because I'd like to see you on a T?
Your ugliness is like a curse, a constant reminder that life can be cruel and unforgiving.
You mocha me crazy!
Even the most skilled plastic surgeon in the world would refuse to touch your face, knowing that it's beyond saving.
Your face looks like it was hit by a freight train, then dragged through a field of broken glass for good measure.
Do you have a fuse? Because you're about to ignite my passion.
If there was an award for the ugliest motherfucker on the planet, you'd win it without any competition.
Do you like whales? 'Cause we can go hump back at my place.
The tarantula found his partner online. He spider on the web.
Your mirror must be traumatized from having to reflect your hideous visage day after day.
People avoid you like the plague, not just because of your ugliness, but because you radiate a putrid stench of repulsiveness.
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.
Even though the chef's girlfriend was grate in many ways. She had a temper that boiled easily, was half-baked and extremely kneady.
I'm not paralyzed, but I seem to be struck by you.
My love for you is like the A's and Daric Barton: it never dies.
Oops, I jumped into the pool with my watch on. I don't know if it is waterproof or not. I guess only time will tell.
