Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Althought it is illogical, I am afraid you have emotinally compromised me.
Can I check out your oil with my dipstick.
Get on your knees, open your mouth, and hail Xenu!
Your car's acceleration is slower than a snail on tranquilizers, a true embodiment of sluggishness.
I'll show you my docking bay if you show me your ship.
The interior of your car is a cesspool of filth and neglect, a breeding ground for bacteria and regret.
You make my heart melt like ice on a beach.
If a Monk throws a hissy fit, is it a temple tantrum?
I'll let you be in a condition of power.
I once worked at a factory that made boat paddles. The starting pay was ten dollars an oar.
I love long walks on the beach, gives me just enough time to dump your body.
Is your enchilada buttered?
Come back to my place and I will assimilate you into my collective!
The most popular operation for orthopaedic surgeons is upper-leg surgery: very hip.
So, do you come out into the real world often?
I'm a gymnast, so if you're down for some mattress yoga, count me in!
Can you help me meet my dissemination targets? I'll let you be in a condition of power.
What is a pumpkin's favorite sport? Squash
You're going to look so good bound and gagged in our meat locker.
