I'm gonna disrupt the shit out of your technology.
Do you want to roll around in my collection of antique buttons and talk about our childhood dreams?
Want to come over and listen to NPR.
Hey girl, is that an original Yo La Tengo 7” in your pants? Because your butt is extremely valuable.
My beard is the same length as Abraham Lincoln's was on his 7th birthday.
Hey baby, let's get coffee and vegan donuts.
I’d like to have you on vinyl.
Was that you at a Vivian Girls concert?
We go together like coffee and cigarettes.
Do you want to go to bed bath and beyond and smell unscented candles and tell each other what we think we smell?
Want to go dumpster diving in my alley?
Lemme add my app to your dashboard. If you know what I mean.
When's the last time you had a good macaroon?
There's an Arcade Fire ... In my pants.
I like my coffee like I like my women: ethical, fair trade, and organic.
I'm in my backyard...in my Eno... It's a double-nester.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together at an Pixies show.
Baby I see our relationship being like a good denim jacket: timeless.
Is that a pair of vintage Ray Bans in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Girl, I got an extra pair of TOMS that might fit you. Want to come over & try them on?
That ironic t-shirt you’re wearing would look better on my floor.
Yeah, I was kind of a big deal at last year’s Expozine.
Did you know that PBR actually stands for ‘Pretty Big Rod’?
I feel like we met at Whole Foods, because you make me feel complete.
Wanna meet my Cobrasnake?
Would you like to be my lock screen?
Hey girl you're as hot as my Venti double shot dark mocha macchiato with no foam.
I love you more than Dustin Kensrue of Thrice loves to write songs referencing fire...
Maybe it’s just the PBR talking, but I could see myself in a non-monogamous relationship with you, or whatever.
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