Are those spurs on your boots or are you just happy to see me?
I just washed my face. So you have a clean place to sit.
Baby, I may have ridden that bronco for 8 seconds, but I'll last a helluva longer on you.
Your eyes are worth at least 100 horses.
Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you're making me hard.
Hey, are you balding, because you sure do SHINE.
Though you are sad, you are still hotter than the bottom of my laptop.
Screw stuffing a turkey this Thanksgiving; just come stuff me!
My vibrator is out of batteries, can I borrow you instead?
As long as I have a face, you have somewhere to sit.
Are you an astronaut? Because I really wanna explore Uranus.
Sit on my face and let me eat my way to your heart.
I saved you a seat...on my face.
If a star would cure sadness, your heart would be empty of sadness.
I can't think straight around you.
Would you like your parrot on this shoulder....or THIS shoulder?
Baby I will be the broom that sweeps all the sadness from your heart.
Why don't you surprise your roommate and not come home tonight?
Let's put the 'fun' in funeral!
Know what would look good on you? CRUTCHES!
Let's listen to The 1975 and make out under the stars.
There's a tornado, come in to my basement.
If you ever want to see your children again, you'll do what I want.
You've stolen my heart away. Luckily, I've got another three or four in the freezer.
Shall I wait for you in my car or will the closet suffice?
Hey baby, do you want to have an abortion a month from now?
Is that blood or wine your having cause I was gonna get you another.
I smell that you are in season... want to breed?
Do you believe in helping the homeless? Take me home with you.
Do you wipe front to back or back to front?
