Are you a grave? Because I want to bury myself inside you!
I wanna spin you upside-down like my cross.
Hey, I'm looking for a second girlfriend. How about you?
My muscle aches are nothing compared to the heartache you're causing me.
Your mom told me to say 'Hi' to you
Do you mind if I hang out here until it's safe back where I farted?
Your boots remind me of red velvet cake, and I love red velvet cake.
So you're still Straight? Have you met me?
My love for you is like a fart. Everything about it is powered by my heart.
You are so beautiful that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I'm 20.
My Mom says I'm the best kisser she's ever known.
You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend.
Does my ass look good in these Wranglers?
Excuse me, did you just fart?
I like my women like I like my wine - 18 years old and boxed up in my basement.
I want to take your skin off and wear it as my own.
The voices like your skin.
Hey baby, you look so good in those jeans I 'd like to chop your legs off.
That is a gun in a pocket and I am not pleased to see you.
Check my prostate if I'm wrong, but do I know you from somewhere?
Come here often? I seriously can't remember.
You, me and the defribrillator, baby.
Baby are you a horse cuz I wanna ride you.
Did it hurt, when you fell off your horse?
Girl, I'm like a champion bull rider, most of the time, I can last for almost 8 seconds.
You sure make me wish I hadn't crapped my pants when that bull charged.
Wanna see how much horsepower is under ma hood?
Hey, lets make like a blunt and roll.
Call me morbid, call me pale, call me yours.
Didn't I go to your funeral?
Are you here alone or am I gonna have to kill someone to win your affection.
Want to be different? Say yes.
I wish I was your mirror.
So, are you a goth? Wanna' get coffee?
My two favorite things are commitment and changing myself.
Hey, we all die alone but did you want to spend a living moment with me?
Yes I drink blood. You wouldn't happen to be menstruating now, would you?
I bet even your farts smell good.
I'm gay, straighten me out! I'm joining the priesthood tomorrow
Damn girl, your legs go all the way up and make an ass of themselves!
I'll be the Rose to your Rosie.
You should have worn that red dress you tried on earlier.
Just call me baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months
I'm working on a porn site. Wanna be in the first video?
You're so cute, I wanna lock you up in my basement.
If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop screaming?
How would you like to help me feel like a kid again.
My van has a wheelchair lift.
Your teeth look great, but they'd look even better in a jar next to my bed.
Hey baby, I'm rich and probably going to die soon.
I should have brought my oxygen tank because you take my breath away.
I'm going to a funeral tomorrow...do you want to join me?
Wanna judge these reckless teenagers together?
You. Me. Dance floor. Now. Don't give me no ado about nothing.
Babe I just want to take you home and show you my big... medicine cabinet.
I like the look of your diaper. It would look even better on my bedroom floor.
Are we related? Cause my pappy done told me to keep it in the family!
So girl, you wanna go to a dance, cause I could lay this hoe-down.
Could you help me out? I'm trying to decide if I want to keep these new hemp sheets, but I need a second opinion.
I like that you don't shave...
I can't stop thinking about kissing your soft lips and running my hands thru your dreaded leg hair.
You know what they say about the size of a man's carbon footprint.
How about we go back to your place and cause some global warming?
Want to come over and feel my new bamboo sheets?
The seat of my vintage moped that runs on bio fuel is vegan leather.
Want to go back to my place and listen to this band before they sell out?
Hey. I like your new-old shoes.
Wanna take a walk through the cemetery?
You would make a beautiful corpse.
You look like you have some darkness inside you. Would you like some more? And, by the way, I call my penis darkness.
Go out with me or I'll kill us both!
Are you a professional dominatrix?
Don't worry, none of this blood is mine.
Can you please smile. I want to know if you are the girl of my dreams.
Do you mind if I push in your stool?
Do you like the telletubbies? Because you look like Tinkie Winkie.
Hey baby, why don't you and me go somewhere nice and pass the Bechdel Test together?
I would drag my balls through 200 yards of broken glass to kiss the dick that fucked you last.
Are you an angel? Because that's the only mythological creature I haven't raped yet.
Black is cool, do you have any acid, sweetheart?
Are you a hot glass of chicken noodle soup? Because I'd love to drink you up!
Girl, let's go invisible.
If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together. But I is already in the middle of something with A, D and S, so I guess it wouldn't work.
I got u something special baby, it's the condom I used when I lost my virginity
Got two nipples for a dime?
I wanna eat the flavors off your tampon
Was your daddy a thief? I'm not. I'm a serial killer.
Hey babe, wanna come over to my place and compare prescription drug plans?
I liverspotted you from across the bar?
Yeah I own my home; it's on the back of my truck.
There's a snake in my boot!
You're so goth I'm gonna use pre-Germanic, tribal, sexual positions on you.
Is that your boyfriend? I think you can do better than that!
I'd like to tie you to a rafter and fuck you up and down.
You know, even my penis sheath is black velvet!
No, no, no... what's your REAL name?
